Day 3/44: The Law of Self-Validation: 44 Days of Self-Love
Welcome to the 44 Days of Self-Love
This is Day 3 of 44 Days of Self-Love — a transformative journey inspired by the book, 44 Laws of Self-Love by Selophy.
For the next 44 days, we’re exploring one law of self-love each day — not just as an idea to read about, but as a practice to live. This journey is about creating a deeper, more compassionate relationship with yourself, one that will change the way you show up in your own life.
Today’s Law - The Law of Self-Validation
Somewhere along the way, many of us became experts at seeking permission to exist as ourselves.
We look for signs that we’re doing “okay” — in the approval of friends, the praise of a boss, the likes on a post, or the validation from family.
But here’s the truth: external validation is like a sugar rush — it feels good for a moment, but it never lasts.
The Law of Self-Validation is about learning to give yourself the credit, the reassurance, and the acknowledgement you’ve been craving from everyone else.
How Self-Validation Complements Self-Worth
In 44 Laws of Self-Love by Selophy, self-worth and self-validation work hand in hand:
Self-Worth says: You are valuable, simply because you exist.
Self-Validation says: You can trust your own thoughts, emotions, and decisions.
Without self-validation, even the strongest sense of self-worth can be shaken by a negative comment or lack of approval.
With it, you’re anchored in your truth, regardless of who agrees.
What Happens When You Rely on External Validation
If you’ve ever delayed a decision until someone else approved it, or felt deflated because nobody noticed your effort, you know the weight of living for external validation.
Here’s what it can lead to:
Decision paralysis — You hesitate because you’re waiting for someone to say “yes.”
Emotional rollercoasters — Your mood rises and falls based on how others react to you.
Loss of authenticity — You start shaping your personality to fit what’s liked, not what’s real.
Over time, this erodes your sense of self and makes you a stranger in your own life.
The Freedom of Self-Validation
When you validate yourself, you:
Accept your feelings without needing others to agree.
Stand by your decisions even if they’re unpopular.
Feel proud without requiring an audience.
It’s not about shutting people out — it’s about not letting their opinion override your own knowing.
This is the core of the Law of Self-Validation:
Your inner voice is worthy of being heard — by you most of all.
A Personal Perspective
When I began practising the Law of Self-Validation, I realised how much of my life was spent performing for invisible judges.
I said “yes” to avoid disappointing others.
I downplayed my feelings in fear of being “too much.”
And I second-guessed decisions that were perfectly aligned with my values.
The turning point came when I decided I didn’t need a jury to approve my life choices.
If something felt right for me — that was enough.
This shift was liberating, and it’s what I hope you’ll experience through these 44 days.
Reflection for Today
What’s one decision, feeling, or choice you’ve been waiting for someone else to validate — that you can choose to validate for yourself today?
What the 44 Days of Self-Love Is About
44 Days of Self-Love is a daily journey inspired by the book, 44 Laws of Self-Love by Selophy.
Each day, we explore one law to help you:
Reconnect with who you are
Heal the parts of you that have been hurting
Grow into the life you deserve
By the end of these 44 days, my hope is that you’ll not only understand self-love — you’ll be living it.
📖 You can explore all 44 laws and Selophy’s Three Pillars of Self-Love — Acceptance, Healing, and Growth — in the book 44 Laws of Self-Love by Selophy.
#44DaysOfSelfLove #Selophy #44LawsOfSelfLove #SelfValidation #SelfWorth #SelfLove #PersonalGrowth #KnowYourself
